I Went to a Golf Tournament to relax and got this column instead

So today I got the luxury of going to the Quail Hollow Country Club, home to the Wells Fargo Championship. For some background I’m not much a golf fan, I don’t play golf, don’t follow it (hell I even change the channel when SportsCenter shows non Tiger Woods golf highlights), golf only moves my needle when Tiger Woods is in contention.  So when a former professor of mine called me to gauge my interest in going with her since she had a hookup with tickets for the event (her husband works for one of the multiple sponsors involved with the tournament), my answer was simple: “Why not?”, I’d figured that I’d go, just take in the sights and just observe, because as we all know sometimes just watching people in their element can be funny. So that’s what I did, and the results were more interesting than I could ever imagine so I had to write a blog post on my experience because it was that funny and provided enlightenment that we all aren’t as different as we’d like to believe sometimes, so I just wrote out the points that just stuck out to me.

 

            Tiger Woods isn’t the only Golf Pro out here prowling these courses for women, and these women definitely know the score out here too: This point was made perfectly clear when I got on the shuttle bus to head over to Quail Hollow. One could literally pluck any female who was on that bus, and placed them in the TV show Dallas (the old one or the one currently coming out). They were dressed to impress their favorite golfer on the tour. My professor even explained that when she used to live out there in an apartment complex near the golf course, some of the pros would take a groupie of his choosing with them in their rented rides and just spend time doing what grown folks do in the abject privacy of the parking lot in that apartment complex, going at it like teenagers apparently.

When you stroll around the golf course, eventually you’ll get to the tee times for all the golfers, some of the bigger names will be left off, but those women looking for the golfer of their choice will be sitting there planning out their strategy to bag their favorite golfer like a plot out of an Mission Impossible movie. So I predict that in about 8 months or so, VH1 is going to debut a new show called Tour Wives, and I promise you it’ll probably just as scandalous if not more than Basketball Wives, these women on this golf tour are THAT crafty.

 

For being at a country club, the food choices there are HIGHLY pedestrian: I understand that one might want to save all the choice food for the golfers and the sponsors and their families (and other people who may schmooze their way in) but come on, for the general public the highlight of the food option was a Bojangles food tent, I understand that some of the folks who will read this will swear by Bojangles greasy, nasty and over seasoned food, but I’m definitely not one of those people. I don’t mean to sound like Cheap Pete from In Living Color but paying almost 10 dollars for a lukewarm turkey sandwich, is downright criminal if not outright highway robbery. However food brings me to another point…

 

If you happened to be of the slimmer build, or perhaps not in possession of a beer gut, you were in very rarefied air: In the nicest way I could possibly say it, one could see that a lot of the golf “fans” had obviously spent a lot of time sitting in front of the TV and watching their favorite golfers, and gorging themselves silly while watching. It truly was a sick microcosm of what our nation currently is, to see a lot of these dudes (and SOME women) struggle to keep moving in the heat, well was pretty sad. However at the same time, I’m not gonna sit here and lie like I didn’t have a ton of jokes (hey I’m only human).  And speaking of human my final point..

 

When are we going to take away the sanctified nature of Golf that only the causal sports fan seem to think it has?? : I came into this practice round thinking that the fan experience to this would be unlike any other that I’d most likely ever see.  Imagine my shock when I found out that the course limits cell phone usage (in this case I should consider myself lucky because at other Golf Tournaments, specifically The Masters, they ban cell phones altogether), now this wouldn’t be a problem if somehow the rest of the experience would make up for it.  Possibly, part of my disappointment comes from the fact that I expected the clientele for this event to be a little more upper class, and was shocked when I saw a lot of the same faces that one would see at the Nascar events that are happening later on in the month. Some of those same faces were probably dressed in the same manner that one would dress for a race, right down to the cut off t-shirt.

I bring this up mainly because in Charlotte, North Carolina, the city I live in, there are certain events that happen during the year which bring large amounts of people of color gets a very bad rap from the locals for bringing in what some folks would consider “undesirables”, however no one ever says anything because these so called “undesirables” bring in almost 50 million dollars annually.  I wonder if the same folks who look down upon the average CIAA attendee, would do so for those who choose to attend the Wells Fargo? I’d wager that average income would be similar for both, probably same education level, just there’d be the one major difference.

What that difference may be lies within those who choose to judge, and if that may be you, I ask you to look inside yourself to take an objective look and really ask what the difference is, the answer may surprise you.

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